Letters From Grandpa #105
- LETTERS FROM GRANDPA
- 105
Dearest Grandchild,
A few days ago I wrote an article about “Marriage”. I sent it to a few friends and received some positive feedback from Africa, India, and also from the U.S.. Remember, there are 26 grandchildren in our family. Some of you are already married, and others so young that marriage is in the distant future. Forgive me if this article is not appropriate for you today, perhaps at some time it will be.
MARRIAGE
“ . . . a married man is concerned . . . how he can please his wife . . . ” - (1 Cor 7:33) “ . . . a married woman is concerned . . . how she can please her husband . . .” (1 Cor 7:34)
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The Spanish word for “wife” is “esposa”.
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The Spanish word for “handcuffs” is “esposar”.
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Conclusion - The Spanish consider “marriage” like being “handcuffed”.
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They are right!
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The morning after marriage is much different than the morning before. Before marriage a man is “free” to think only of himself. Afterward, he is “bound for life” to his wife. Both husband a wife invariably have their own unique routine preparing for the day. After they are married, however, each spouse is invariably “inconvenienced”. This is the way that God intended it to be. In some mysterious way the self denial of marriage helps us to be like Jesus. If the marriage is to succeed, both husband and wife must deny themselves and try to “please” the other. Or as Paul expressed it: “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ (Eph. 5:19).
This inconvenient consideration of another involves everything. It involves setting the alarm, using the bathroom, planning the breakfast, scheduling the day, and virtually every other aspect of life. Remember! The married man must try to please his wife, and the married woman must try to please her husband. The God given roles of husband and wife, of course, are different.
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The worthy husband provides for and protects his family (1 Tim. 5:8).
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The worthy wife cares for her household and is not idle (Prov. 31:27)
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The godly husband will love his wife as Christ loves the church (Eph. 5:25).
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The godly wife will submit to her husband like the church submits to Christ (Eph. 5:24).
This profound “mystery” of marriage actually reflects the relationship between Christ and the church (Eph. 5:32). Just as we do things we prefer not to do to please our spouse, we also do things we prefer not to do to please Christ. That’s what marriage is all about. That’s what Christianity is all about. It doesn’t matter whether you like to read the Bible, pray, and go to church. Since you are married to Christ you are committed to do the things that please Him.
The book of Hebrews reminds us that we have not yet resisted unto the shedding of blood
struggling against sin (Heb. 12:4). What tiny suffering and inconvenience we endure to please Christ pales into insignificance by comparison with Calvary. Remember! “He died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.” (2 Cor 5:15)
Perhaps you have heard the saying: “If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!” This is true! When married people do things to only please themselves, they are flying in the face of what Christ commands. When we deny ourselves to please our mate, however, the peace we experience is worth the price we pay. Against all human wisdom, we actually find greater happiness in serving our spouse than we ever experienced serving ourselves. Miserly people are invariably miserable!
The Scriptures remind us that Jesus endured the cross for the “joy” that was set before H im (Heb. 12:2). This profound truth will stand up under the most careful scrutiny. Nobody ever regrets obedience to God. Fortunately, Christ prayed the proper prayer when He said to His Father: “Not my will but thine be done”. We will never regret praying that same prayer!
One of the most wonderful aspects of marriage is it’s finality. The wedding vows are for better or worse, sickness or health, richer or poorer, until death do us part. No matter what happens, Jesus has promised that He will never leave us or forsake us (Heb. 13:5). No matter what happens, let’s make the same promise to Him!
Just heard a few minutes ago of a woman who is divorcing her husband and trying to get a job at a casino. How sad! I am praying that if and when you marry, you will do what Christ commands, and marry someone who is committed to serving Jesus.
I love you,
Grandpa Boyce